I found myself quite engaged recently while reading a deeply personal, highly moving piece in the Washington Post, “Why Parents Want to Believe in a Vaccine Conspiracy.” That headline on Susan Senator’s essay drew me in, as it certainly signals that parents averse to immunizations are misguided and even self-deceptive.
On the other hand, the author at least engages the error-riddled thinking of those whose views she explains… or is that, explains away? By explaining why people would trust unsubstantiated conspiracy theories as a means to coping with the pain of raising a child on the autism spectrum, Senator risks explaining away the concerns of other parents, and risks substituting a simplistic explanation for what are deemed to be absurd beliefs.
I believe each family needs to figure out what works for them, as long as it doesn’t threaten the health of others.
Don’t get me wrong. I agree that vaccine conspiracy talk is not only wacky, but potentially dangerous in terms of public health.
But I also want to be careful about any explanations which allow those of us who, like them, feel immediately smarter, more evolved or superior to those with whom we disagree – especially when the path to wisdom leads to a happy (happier than expected) ending, as it does in Senator’s story. As she observes about her son, “Whatever caused Nat’s autism did not crush him. He is all there. Still very autistic but growing toward the light nevertheless.”
Contrary to what the author suggests, some scientists still do not agree about a possible link between parent positivity and/or acceptance of autism, and the progress made by their autistic children. Plenty of parents remained mired in the misery of having a disabled child, and they work hard to help their children to achieve more than anyone ever thought they could. Other parents genuinely accept autism not as a disability, but as a different ability; still, their kids are not necessarily happier or more successful.
As one with a child whose diagnosed disability turned out to be far less challenging (or limiting) than we’d been prepared to expect, I can honestly see benefits and costs to many parenting approaches – each of which seems to get 15 minutes of fame. I believe each family needs to figure out what works for them, as long as it doesn’t threaten the health of others. And that is my only real objection to vaccine conspiracy theorists.
At the end of the day, both Senator and those she’s responding to are very much in the same boat. Most of us are, when it comes to the most challenging issues and debates. Naturally, all parents long for a way to make sense of the pain they face. Some (the conspiracy theorists) are drawn to stories of devils and boogeymen. Others take heart in promises of happy, or at least happier, endings. And some parents of neuro-atypical kids simply seek the strength and wisdom to navigate choppy and uncharted waters, which will likely remain the domain of their lives.
Having been each of those parties, at different times in my life, the experience informs me with the knowledge that all three approaches are options, and we can draw on them as needed. Indeed, that may be the wisest way to deal with whatever life throws at us.

Listed for many years in Newsweek as one of America’s “50 Most Influential Rabbis” and recognized as one of our nation’s leading “Preachers and Teachers,” by Beliefnet.com, Rabbi Brad Hirschfield serves as the President of Clal–The National Jewish Center for Learning and Leadership, a training institute, think tank, and resource center nurturing religious and intellectual pluralism within the Jewish community, and the wider world, preparing people to meet the biggest challenges we face in our increasingly polarized world.
An ordained Orthodox rabbi who studied for his PhD and taught at The Jewish Theological Seminary, he has also taught the University of Pennsylvania, where he directs an ongoing seminar, and American Jewish University. Rabbi Brad regularly teaches and consults for the US Army and United States Department of Defense, religious organizations — Jewish and Christian — including United Seminary (Methodist), Yeshivat Chovevei Torah (Modern Orthodox) Luther Seminary (Lutheran), and The Jewish Theological Seminary (Conservative) — civic organizations including No Labels, Odyssey Impact, and The Aspen Institute, numerous Jewish Federations, and a variety of communal and family foundations.
Hirschfield is the author and editor of numerous books, including You Don’t Have To Be Wrong For Me To Be Right: Finding Faith Without Fanaticism, writes a column for Religion News Service, and appears regularly on TV and radio in outlets ranging from The Washington Post to Fox News Channel. He is also the founder of the Stand and See Fellowship, which brings hundreds of Christian religious leaders to Israel, preparing them to address the increasing polarization around Middle East issues — and really all currently polarizing issues at home and abroad — with six words, “It’s more complicated than we know.”